I usually don’t do song by song review types or anything like that on this blog, but after the leaks (cough from the normal sources), I’m certain ⊿ (Triangle) deserves attention and praise for what its achieved – both for Nakata and for Perfume.

Starting with the songs themselves: Take off is a futuristic opener with a simple concept: a countdown from ten to one until the start of the actual songs. What it does differently is that each number is repeated three time – presumably once representing for each girl, and going off the triad concept of the album. The synth is gorgeous and the vocalizations add to the mystery of the short track. I do believe the transition into love the world could be slightly better handled, but the pairing is marvelous: similar synth sounds, but one mysterious and dark leading into one cheerful and poppy.

love the world is followed by Dream Fighter, and sounds like a fairly natural progression given that the two singles seemed to pair along from the very beginning. It then leads into edge(⊿-mix) – a more aggressive version on what is already an (shall I say it?) edgy song. Most of it sounds very similar to the original and extended versions of the track, but the additional synth created melodies inserted in between the vocals, along with the addition of distorted noise and pure instrumental portions, give the track even more of a gritty club feel than the original.

edge leads into NIGHT FLIGHT, this year’s PINO CM song. The song has a throwback feel with 80’s style synth instrumentals, but don’t pin it as retro: Perfume’s echoed vocals and a strong synth bass line give this track a modern twist. The song is sophisticated and is at the same time catchy.

Kiss and Music is next, a funky and sometimes dissonant slow track. Unlike most of Perfume’s music, Kiss and Music lacks a distinct pop melody and track – instead, it offers a fairly simple minor track paired with sensual, almost spoken lyrics.

It’s then a smooth transition into Zero Gravity that’s a fun midtempo version of 90’s shibuya-kei. It has a clear piano backing track to match soft and sweet vocals. The song is – for the lack of a better description – adorable, and is a nice change of style for the girls.

I still love U follows to give us a retro styled track paired with a unforgetably catchy melody. The instrumental itself sounds like 80s and 90s synth pop. The vocals switch between vocoded to be muffled and more distorted and to be  fairly clear. The chorus is sweet and longing and wonderfully paired with strains of violin.  The only fault of the song is breakdown before the last chorus: it adds a nice emphasis on the last part but should ideally be only half or less of its current length.

The best thing follows with fun twinkly synth sounds paired with a fun melody. The chorus is catchy and fun to sing along to. It doesn’t achieve anything new but does give a great song. It leads into Speed of Sound – which is less of a Perfume track than something like an interlude. There’s no distinct melody and Perfume only contributes spoken words into a colorfully varying song. The lack of melody makes the song more of a club than a pop song, but the song does provide a cute atmosphere.

The ending of the Speed of Sound leads nicely into the grating synth beginning to One Room Disco. Finally, the album ends with Negai (album mix). The difference would be the addition of acoustic piano and strings to the beginning, as well as along with additional acoustic effects throughout the song’s arrangement. The additional instruments sound a little messy paired with the heavy percussion during the bridge and refrains, but the addition of strings and timpani is a perfect addition during the choruses. There’s also a pleasant new acoustic ending to the song. I loved the original Negai, but I think the album mix offers a more personal, humanized version of the song – a fitting ending to an album that was strictly electronic.

Overall, I think ⊿ is an amazing album musically and Nakata has done a great job once again – there are definitely going to be new Perfume favorites coming out of this.

And to address the increasingly common viewpoint that Perfume is becoming capsule part two, I think ⊿ can confidently disprove that claim. It’s true that some of the songs wouldn’t look out of place in a current capsule album – like Take Off, Kiss and Music, or Speed of Sound – but the other tracks are all still the pop-based technopop Perfume fans know and love. Do you thinks  Yes, the songs do feature significantly stronger club-based influences, but does anyone want Perfume’s music to have stalled permanently at the offerings in GAME? Yes, Perfume sounds differently in ⊿ – but they sounded differently in GAME from Complete Best too. It’s natural for an artist to evolve, even if the evolution is strongly based on the producer. I think its brave for Nakata and Perfume to try some drastically new styles in the album songs when they could have just have released a rehash of songs that sound right in place in GAME in order to continue off the sophomore album’s success.

Most importantly, ⊿ makes me realize how big an influence Perfume is in the music. No, I do not believe Nakata would be able to make I still love U as charming as he did if he had used Toshiko’s vocals instead of mixing Perfume’s three lines together. The vocoding has changed and it’s harder to differentiate the three voices – but you can still differentiate three different voices during the solos for most of the songs. Perfume still adds their personal charm to their songs and are still present.

If you’re feeling disappointed that Perfume in ⊿ no longer sounds like the Polyrhythm or Chocolate Disco Perfume you fell in love with, throw away your bias and just listen to the music for a moment, and tell me if you enjoy it. And if not, that’s fine, it’s just not your style: personally, my GAME loving heart still thinks GAME is one of the best albums of all time. But lets put Perfume’s history aside for a moment.

Hmm. That’s been a rambling. I guess in conclusion what I’m saying is just that ⊿ is an AMAZING album, and I’m loving several of the new album tracks with just a few listens. Go on and give them a try – whether you’re a big fan of Perfume’s sound in GAME or not, you might be pleasantly surprised!

While youtube-browsing, I came across a clip of Music Station that goes back through the history of Johnny’s. Apart from the fact that their gay, colorful, sparkly outfits apparently haven’t changed for more than two decades, one thing struck as odd – if this is the entire history of Johnny’s popular artists, why is it that around halfway through the video I can recognize every group and song?

A simple wikipedia search (well, maybe not that simple for me) later, I know I’m not just hallucinating from too many cheesy pop songs: of the Johnny’s artist debuted since the beginning of the 1980s, more than half of them are still media active.

A few disclaimers before I move on: I counted “media active” as idol groups that still release music as a whole, and receive mass media attention amongst the general public. Thus, Shounentai releasing new singles and albums counted as being active; Shounentai doing PLAYZONE and only that every year did not. Also, I only included the officially debuted groups (if the info is wrong, blame wiki.jp!), not counting temporary groups and solo projects. I also didn’t include solo artists like Masahiko Kondo and Toshihiko Tahara, because solo careers had unique paths.

From my handy chart (color-coded in rainbow shades, of course) you see how Johnny’s idoldom dramatically changed with SMAP in the 1990s. Johnny’s ruled with male idols, but at one point in time being a male idol meant going in with a bang when you were young and fading out of the limelight in a few years to do some solo projects or stageplays. Another point to note is that, while Johnny’s as a company was always powerful and popular, their releases were not always chart toppers.

SMAP headed the start of the current Johnny’s wave by becoming not just pop idols that fade out but a group of cultural icons. However, it’s of my opinion that the time all Johnny’s started gaining even more popularity was at the time of KinKi Kids’ debut. With KinKi Kids, chart topping became standard.

I think, as Johnny’s fans, we’re starting to expect permanence. Before, you’d expect your favorite group to be popular for five years, and soon “graduate” or disband. But now, you’d expect to see bands last for at least a decade. SMAP, TOKIO, V6, KinKi, and Arashi have all been in the business for about ten years or more. With the exception of SMAP, who aren’t traditional Johnny’s anyways, none of the groups seem like they’ll disband anytime soon and are all active with releasing music or touring. Arashi is at the very peak of their popularity, now that they have the top two singles of 2008. TOKIO, V6, and Kinki Kids, despite a downward trend of sales since their peak, still do extremely well – for example, despite the worst single sales since their debut, KinKi Kids continue top the charts, even on yearly rankings.

Popularity of Johnny’s also now seems guaranteed. Around 2003 and 2004, NEWS were widely advertised as being a group that has had every single go to number one on the charts.  Just a few years later though, it’s uncommon for a debuted Johnny’s group to not release something and have it shoot straight to the top. In a time of declining physical sales, Johnny’s continuously push fans to visit the record stores by promising DVD extras, different tracklistings, multiple versions, or sometimes just a different cover design. Consumerist mindset encourages purchases, and the tracking of sales makes fans compete to get their group the most “successful” or “popular” by topping charts, even if it’s falsely inflated by a single person making multiple purchases.

It’s perhaps our willingness to buy that keeps these bands in business. Let’s be honest – when was the last time SMAP seemed truly excited about releasing a song? If I’d wager a guess, they’d probably all rather do their individual projects. But they can continue to sell tens, hundreds of thousands of copies even with mostly uninspired and unexciting songs, so there’s no incentive to stop releasing.

The issue now is, how many groups can you squeeze into the market before there really cannot be any more Johnny’s?

Personal experience tells me that it is impossible for someone to be completely devoted to more than three groups; most people can only concentrate their attentions on one. NEWS, Kanjani8, and KAT-TUN share its You&J fanclub under the idea that fans of one would be fans of the others too – but the difference in sales and media attention for the groups show that just because you’re a fan of Jin doesn’t mean you’re going to go out and buy his bff Yamapi’s NEWS singles too. And of course, some fans skip around – maybe you were a KinKi Kids fan, but the KAT-TUN hiprolls just captivated you. Or you liked V6, but their general lack of activity sometimes caused you to become a bigger NEWS fan. But if the continued sales show anything, it’s that every group has its core group of devoted fans who will support it under every circumstance.

Johnny’s is popular with younger girls, of course, but their lasting popularities are from the long-time fans and wide age ranges. (SMAP’s popularity comes from that they reached older age group; the mostly underage Hey!Say!JUMP definitely has fans that range from elementary school to middle age.) So if groups keep debuting and debuting, one day there just won’t be enough people interested enough in a new group of boys to have the same kind of popularity.

Whereas in the 80s, you could be a die-hard Otokogumi fangirl – then they’d drop out of the media spotlight, and you could focus your attention on the new shiny groups like SMAP or V6 that pop up and debut – you’d never really have that need to find your new Johnny’s of choice anymore. If I love V6 and they continue to entertain me with their music and media appearances, why would I want to spend time and money to go to concerts and buy CDs of some new group I don’t know or love as much?

At the same time that Johnny’s has established its power by having groups that can continuously sell themselves over five years, ten years, even twenty years, it limits its potential for growth. With the debut of new groups year by year, there seemed to be a dramatic increase in the popularity of newer groups – but it will stop.

Despite the insane amount of media attention Hey!Say!JUMP received for their debut, they just couldn’t be the next big thing – due in part, I’d wager, that so many of the young girls in its targeted age group are already fans of a You & J group.

Unless the older groups disband or every group jointly loses popularity, there’s no way for Johnny’s to keep up its streak of mega-popular bands. So maybe it’s a bubble just waiting to be popped, where our beloved bands will start retiring again once there are so many groups that they cannot all sustain high sales. Or maybe we’re living a golden age of Johnny’s – a special group of idol superstars that are continuously successful for decades.

I hope what I wrote made sense; it’s hard thinking about anything after taking all those finals. (I hope this makes up for me not writing anything for the first half of December. )

Kohaku’s artist lineup for this year has been released.

Newcomers on the red team (female) are Aoyama Thelma, Akimoto Junko (enka singer who I think made it big this year with her single “Ai no Mama De”), Ikimonogakari, GIRL NEXT DOOR, Perfume, and Fujioka Fujimaki and Ohashi Nozomi (the two men and the little girl who sang the theme to Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea).

Newcomers to the white team (male) are Kimaguren, Kiyama Yusaku, Jero, Shuchishin with Pabo, Tohoshinki(DBSK), Mr. Children, and Mizutani Yutaka (enka singer who made a comeback).

Overall, expected additions for the year. I’m not familiar with enka singers, but the female singers who made it big this year all made it onto the show (Perfume! Yes!). I’m surprised and pleased that Ikimonogakari are finally on. For the male artists though, I’m surprised it took this long for Mr. Children to make it on.

Full lineup is

RED TEAM: aiko, Aoyama Thelma, Akiyama Junko, Ayaka, Angela Aki, Ikimonogakari, Ishikawa Sayuri, Otsuka Ai, Kawanaka Mizuki, GIRL NEXT DOOR, Koda Kumi, Godai Natsuko, Kobayashi Sachiko, Sakamoto Fuyumi, SPEED, Tendo Yoshimi, Nakashima Mika, Nakamura Mitsuko, Hamasaki Ayumi, Perfume, Hitoto Yo, Hirahara Ayaka, Fuji Ayako, Fujioka Fujimaki and Ohashi Nozomi, Mizumori Kaori, and Wada Akiko.

WHITE TEAM: Akikawa Masafumi, Aqua Timez, Itsuki Hiroshi, EXILE, Kitajima Saburo, Kitayama Takeshi, Kimagurin, Kiyama Yusaku, Kobukuro, Shuuchishin with Pabo, SMAP, Tohoshinki (DBSK), TOKIO, Tokunaga Hideaki, Hikawa Kiyoshi, Hirai Ken, Fuse Akira, Porno Graffiti, Maekawa Kiyoshi, Mikawa Kenichi, Mr. Children, Mizutani Yutaka, Mori Shinichi, Moriyama Naotaro, and WaT.

Overall, same as you’d expect – the popular pop artists plus all those established enka singers (I had to google every one of them… pain). I’m glad that Perfume made it onto Kouhaku – hopefully, they’ll be here the year after too. Also, Tohoshinki has officially made it big in Japan. Absent from the list are any girl idols besides Perfume – not a year for AKB48 or H!P, I guess. Also absent despite their pretty big hype this year: Amuro Namie, Fukuhara Miho, and Shimizu Shota.

So will Kouhaku be your Japanese new year’s programming of choice?

(…unfortunately, no matter how nicely Perfume and Otsuka Ai will be strutting their stuff on stage, all the enka will render my early death. Yeah, not really a fan. I’ll be sticking to my good old standby: Johnny’s Countdown. )

Now that my music collection is temporarily out of commission, I’m turning to CDs again – and it hit me how little official Japanese music I own. I love J-pop – I have thousands of J-pop songs by several artists that I love, and I love watching PVs and concert DVDs – but as for the ones I buy, this is it.

Here’s the question: what CDs do you own? Do you buy all releases that you like? Do you buy some releases that you like? Do you only buy overseas versions? Do you only buy pirated versions? Do you not buy anything at all? And if you do buy a lot of releases – how do you afford it?

I know we should support the artists, and I encourage everyone to buy the music if you can, but it’s not realistic for a lot of us. I see photos of some peoples’ extensive J-pop CD collections and is very jealous; I’d love to own the music and support that artistss I love. But when a few singles cost $100 to ship to me when the same $100 feeds me for a month – well, I love J-pop but food still wins out. Sorry, artists. ):

I bought the releases on the bottom row secondhand just to own them because they are music that I truly love or have sentimental value. (Deep River is an amazing album; “Rolling Star’s” b-side is one of my favorite YUI songs; Judy and Mary’s “Sobakasu” was one of my first J-pop songs.) I buy all of NEWS’ things because Johnny’s has effectively sucked me into being their money-offering minion (at least I don’t buy two copies of each release. Yet.) I don’t know why I own “Best of KAT-TUN”. The WaT single was a freebie with the KAT-TUN CD. A lot of those have never been listened to – until now, at least.

I don’t display them (no space), I don’t listen to them (mp3s win out), and I don’t – what else could you do with CDs? I like having them around because they’re nice to take out, look the the booklets, or maybe look up some lyrics – but that’s about it. I do watch the DVDs – that’s the only discs that actually get any playing!

So do you buy your J-pop? And when you buy them, do you listen to them, display them, or just have them for the sake of having, like me?

First things first: with some computer problems, I haven’t really been too caught up on the scene and what’s happening – which means I haven’t been blogging much and probably won’t be blogging much for awhile.

But just for fun while I’m borrowing a friend’s computer, here’s a list of the ladies in Japanese entertainment I want to look like the most. I found that many times, talent and popularity doesn’t equal me exactly wanting to look at them – and women that male fans (and some female fans) drool over don’t seem so hot to me.

So based completely on being shallow and judgmental on looks for once, here’s my top ten girls:

10. Toda Erika

Toda Erika used to look a little weird and awkward to me, but it’s mostly her fashion that caught my attention. I’ll admit, I only started liking her after I saw her in her drama Liar Game with a great colorful costume, bright tights and all. Also, recently she’s been going for a more sexy look – and it’s really working for her.

9. Otsuka Ai

Otsuka Ai has her moments for me; sometimes she looks really insanely gorgeous, and sometimes she looks kind of frumpy (her Rocket Sneaker promotions, or her Tokyo Friends promotion posters…) but I think she has great style – I always want to copy her clothes and hairstyles. (And, she really deserves a spot on this list because I actually went into a salon with her Renai Shashin-era picture, asking for that haircut.) Quirky style, and pulls everything off really cute and prettily.

8. Tanaka Reina

I knew almost nothing about Tanaka Reina; I still don’t know much about her aside from that she’s one of the tops in Momusu now and that she has wonky eyes, but ever since a long time ago I thought she was really beautiful; it’s all in those amazing eyes.

7. Nocchi of Perfume

Nocchi has her moments for me – sometimes she looks plain on shows – but most times, she’s so amazing and fierce. A lot of her appeal towards me comes from her hair – I always love her hairstyles. I also love how she pulls off her clothes; she looks good in almost everything.

6. Suzuki Airi

Yet another H!P girl I know almost nothing about, except for that fact that she’s really pretty. And yes, she’s young, but hey – judging totally on looks here. Like Tanaka Reina, I really like Airi’s eyes.

5. Shaku Yumiko

Shaku Yumiko is just really, really hot. And wears clothes really well. I mean, I finished her drama Himitsu no Hanazono not for male eye candy but because I really liked the clothes she wore in that drama. And – really now, look at the picture, she’s just really, really hot.

4. Ishihara Satomi

Ishihara Satomi used to look kind of plain sometimes, but recently she’s just been layering on the wow factor. Always really simple looking, but pulls everything off really perfectly – just gorgeous. I haven’t watched her dramas so I have no idea how she carries herself, but from what I’ve seen she’s beautiful and graceful.

3. Aya of SweetS

Yeah, okay, SweetS has been defunct for awhile and I have no idea what she looks like now – but I love how SweetS-era Aya looked like. Style-wise, not so much, but she has a very pretty face.

2. Horikita Maki

She’s not a “standard beauty” by any sense, but she can pull off the long hair and flirty dresses or the short hair and boyish fashion. She is just beautiful, period, and so close to being #1 on my list, if not for…

1. Aragaki Yui

Aragaki Yui is just so naturally gorgeous. Her hair, makeup, and clothes are all rather simple, but she always pulls it off beautifully. It doesn’t hurt that she actually has great style, of course.

So there we go – if I wake up tomorrow looking as Aragaki Yui, I could die happily.

When my roommate said to me that Ohno Satoshi of Arashi had a marijuana and threesome rumor, I laughed, because come on, that just sounds unbelievably ridiculous.

And it still sounds unbelievably ridiculous. From what I can gather from the little bits of information over at the Arashi community at Vox, there’s information of Ohno having participated in a threesome and that he was caught at a club smoking pot – which is bad, not only because Ohno is in a drama and the group that will be promoting the Olympics on NTV, but because pot is really, really illegal in Japan, and so the police will be investigating into this.

I think gossip mags in Japan are a load of shit. A lot of the time the stuff they report stuff that’s not true, and the photos they post half the time are pretty dumb too (A posed in a picture with B – they must be having a dirty sex relationship, oh nooo.) But that’s not to say the gossip mags don’t get it right sometimes either – with disastrous results. Just from grainy photos, lot of H!P girls have been ousted for smoking or having boyfriends, a lot of Johnny’s have gotten kicked out (nameless juniors, Uchi and Kusano from NEWS).

Johnny’s has a lot of girlfriend scandals – none of which I care much about. Yamapi dating Abiru Yuu? Why not? Koki’s a gangsta who bangs porn stars – sure. Takaki Yuya took purikura with Kato Rubi from 9nine – oohh nooo. Years back, Aiba Masaki’s ex leaked photos of the two of them – I actually thought those were pretty cute photos. SMAP’s Nakai is dating Koda Kumi – yeah, okay, not like either of them are getting younger.

But rumors of real illegal activity is serious business. I believe there was a Johnny’s Juniors drinking scandal a long time back – who knows now, because those juniors disappeared from the company. Uchi Hiroki got caught drunk and got suspended; Kusano Hironori got caught drinking something out of a can and got suspended. Akasaka Akira of old school Johnny’s Hikaru Genji got caught with some meth – and, well, this wasn’t a gossip mag thing, but he got caught by the police, and immediately fired even though he was a long-time Johnny’s.

Now, I don’t think these photos say anything about pot – they don’t even say that Ohno banged those two ladies, because I don’t know about everyone else, but I imagine threesomes to be without clothing. And honestly, I doubt the pot rumor will amount to anything – even if Ohno does smoke the chronic, I’m sure he’d have had time to get rid of his stash by now and purged his system. Heck, even if Ohno farms marijuana in his apartment I’m sure the jimusho would find some way to cover it up.

Now, I’m not saying that smoking marijuana or marijuana growing is a-okay just because it’s a Johnny doing it – but before I see accusations, I’d like to see even a little proof. They don’t even have photos of Ohno with any smoke anywhere. Are they judging his “drug use” from the words of one woman? His weight? (He’s busy, and he’s always been skinny.) His expression? (Watch any Arashi show – he is always spaced out.) His actions? (That a almost-30 man is touching some scantily dressed women?) Now that Ohno is getting some attention of his own, it’s time for him to get picked on – and I suppose that just some girlfriend or sex rumors isn’t enough to sell the magazines anymore, so there’s drug rumors now?

Who are these people at the magazine posting these trashy stories, and who are those grody bitches who sell the photos and stories to the magazines? Get a life.

Excite article
Translation by VampyRep at vox

Edit July 29;

According to Fybabe’s Boys blog that has kindly translated numerous articles, Ohno has admitted to having a threesome but denied the marijuana rumor. Activities for Ohno and Arashi will be going on as usual.

And – this is the best part – here is where JE demonstrates its yakuza qualities. They immediately went to calm and quiet the media, and supposedly cut deals with the publishing company Kodansha that includes the gossip magazine and several other high power publications, including their very profitable yearly calendar deal with Johnny’s. All this, and blend in rumors of this happening because a person in charge of publications died recently, allegations of photoshop, and the fact that this whole thing is blown up pretty crazy makes the whole thing pretty funny to me.

If JE is really blacklisting Kodansha… I bet the higher-ups are furious with the gossip magazine because, hello, really really popular and profitable business deal shattered. They don’t do all the JE calendars, but it’s already a multi-billion yen industry. Just selling calendars to fangirls. Kodansha is a big company, but this has to be at least somewhat painful for them.

I’m glad Johnny’s seems to be completely backing Ohno. Yay for Arashi. I hope the scandal effectively ends here and the whole thing blows over soon.

Edit July 30; Support Ohno?

With Hikki working on her second English album, the question really still stands: if one j-pop diva or female group would make it in the English music industry, who would it be? After all, basing on the American charts, popular songs by female artists are rather limited. Pretty much most are R&B/hip hop hits (Rihanna, Beyonce, Fergie, Danity Kane, Mariah Carey, Leona Lewis), a smattering of pop rock (Colbie Caillat, Natasha Bedingfield, Paramore) and occasionally, a big pop song that makes it (Miley Cyrus).

So if all our favorite j-pop girls give it a try, who has the best chances of breaking into the market?

Utada Hikaru

I love Hikki and I love “Exodus,” but let’s face it – “Exodus” was brilliantly experimental and alternative but nowhere near mainstream. If she does her next English album in her Cubic U style or in her Japanese music style, she’d have a chance, but her idea of American mainstream R&B is a little too alternative. Unless she completely changes her image and sound, she won’t make it in the urban music genre she’s aiming for. But she does have beauty, quirkiness, and her language – she just needs to tailor herself to be more mainstream. Chances: 60%.

Ayumi Hamasaki

Ayu may be the queen of Jpop on the island, but only her very rock influenced songs would have a chance. The pop, the ballads – they’d all have to go. She definitely has the confident diva attitude as long as she tunes down the cute, but there’d also have to be an overhaul of image too – some of her visual trademarks, like her gaudy nails, princessy hair, shiny costumes, just won’t go over well. Chances: 30%.

Koda Kumi

Hell, Koda Kumi did a duet with Fergie; to be painfully honest, she’s not that much of a looker but has the music style and sluttiness to make it through the modern industry. Polish up the English, cut away all the perky bubbliness, do away with the ero-kawaii for just 120% ero, and call up Fergie to get Will.I.Am to produce some shallow hip-hop song for her – I can see it working. Chances: 80%.

Otsuka Ai

I love Ai-chin, so it pains me to say – this just isn’t going to happen. Well, her happy hyper songs have absolutely no chance. If promoted correctly – say in a movie soundtrack or something – a ballad of hers might have a chance, but only if she improves her voice 200% live and gets a completely different, more mature image. Unfortunately, English speakers just aren’t ready for intricate pop ballads and high voices like hers. Chances: 1%.

YUI

I’d say YUI actually has a pretty decent chance if she could get the English down – she has the guitar-strumming singer-songwriter vibe down for some songs and a hardcore rock chick image down for the other. She’s shy, which hurts her a bit, but she commands the stage well when she performs. The only thing that might not work out well is her voice – you usually don’t get such high, sweet voices in pop rock – but she does have the pretty face and the musician vibe. Chances: 60%.

Aoyama Thelma

This girl has the voice for R&B – she’s the right type of voice to do all those hooks on the hip hop songs, you know, that sweet but powerful backing to some guy’s aggressive rapping – but she doesn’t have the gorgeous looks to gain attention or the star presence to make up for it. I mean, look at her performances – there’s hardly any attitude or presence at all. Her voice would work, but unless she gains 500% more attitude no one would pay any attention. Chances: 40%.

ayaka

Ayaka has the looks and voice, most definitely. She also has the bohemian gypsie image down pat. To make it though, she’d have to get some good songs – none of those boring ballad singles that she’s put out recently. It’s also hard to pull off her image and music these days unless she writes her own music and plays an instrument – so might want to work on that. Chances: 50%.

BoA

She can sing and dance. Her voice isn’t really suited for hip-hop or R&B, but – I can actually really see this working. But she’d really have to get some new songs – none of her ballady or pop-dance songs would even remotely work. She also needs more attitude – when she sings, she just doesn’t sound aggressive or strong, more poppy and cute – which just won’t work. Chances: 30%.

Morning Musume

Hmm. Well, supposing the current lineup does more R&B shaded songs, like “Resonant Blue” but with a much more aggressive beat, it would work – if you cut out some members or give them complete personality changes. The girls can look and perform fiercely, but some things – like Reina’s incessant winking and Koharu’s creepy bug eyed toothy grin – will have to go, permanently. Just don’t smile, look sexy, dance to a song with a good beat – they might be able to pull it off. Chances: 35%.

Perfume

Not to say that they’re a Japanese female technopop idol trio, but just being technopop will be enough to put them out of the running. Forever. But they’re on this list because they have a terrific chance of making it big in the English speaking electronic music industry – a lot of their songs are sure to be club hits. But as for mainstream – Chances: 0%.

JYONGRI

JYONGRI has impeccable English skills already; her style and image, not so much. Most of her music is synth backed pop, which isn’t bad, but might need to be toned a bit more to a Westernized pop style at risk of sounding retro and outdated. Looks-wise, JYONGRI isn’t the most beautiful girl out there, but she could look unique and fierce (read: Possession PV) and using a forward-tilting synthesizer could help her gain a unique image somewhat, if she can actually truly play it while performing. Chances: 40%.

PUFFY

Well, in a way, PUFFY has already made it as Puffy AmiYumi. Their Cartoon Network deal has given them some good songs – I’ll be honest, I didn’t know PUFFY did the Teen Titans theme and when I watched it I was jammin’ out to it. But they haven’t gotten major prominence yet – they have a pop rock kind of thing going on. If they can improve the English more and get a good song out – who knows, maybe. Chances: 70%.

Berryz Koubou

It’s not going to work even remotely for at least another five years, unless they all learn English and get a Disney Channel show a la Hannah Montana, and put out bad pop songs that little children love. Chances: 15%.

C-ute

Same as Berryz Koubou… except I see Berryz as more likely to be liked by the tween crowd. Chances: 10%.

Amuro Namie

Namie can do it. She’s sexy, full of attitude, and her music is hip-hop enough to be accepted. Her personality is a bit bland live, but her performances have spirit because her singing and dancing are near top-notch. Her current image is dark, exotic, and dominating – very commanding, and very fierce. If she has good English and gets some good songs, I can see her doing well. Chances: 75%.

Kimura Kaela

Kimura Kaela has her model looks to benefit her. She has a great hipster image – and while most hipster pop music isn’t mainstream, sometimes one becomes mainstream. If she gets lucky, she could work out well. Chances: 50%.

Leah Dizon

Leah Dizon can’t really sing and can’t really dance… but she’s beautiful, sexy, an import model. And seeing what hot (slutty) models can achieve in the American music industry… it’s almost scary how decent of a chance she has. And if she’s not breaking into the market as a singer, she could always become a video girl in a hip hop video – she’d fit right in, really. Chances: 60%.

Nakashima Mika

Nakashima Mika has a beautiful ethereal voice. Her jazzy, pop works would never make it overseas; the rock songs she does, however, do have potential, especially if she starts to front the vocals of a rock band instead of being a solo artist (just… a legitimate one, not an almost-joke one like MICA3CHU). But her image right now wouldn’t work – she might make it as a goth rock chick or something, but she just looks way, waaaay too creepy for mainstream audiences to handle. Chances: 10%.

Tsuchiya Anna

It helps that Tsuchiya Anna already has legions of Nana fans under her belt. Her English isn’t perfect, but her rock music would definitely have a shot at making it. She also has the edgy rock image that’s very appealing. Chances: 65%.

Goto Maki

Now that Gocchin is with avex, she seems to be going to divalicious R&B image even more than before? Well, he supposed sensei is Beyonce, after all. But if she is going for the diva route, she’s going to have to whore it up much, much more. She has the sexy image down in Japan, but “Some Boys! Touch” wouldn’t even raise eyebrows; she’d need an upped image and upped dance moves. Chances: 40%.

Yuna Ito

Yuna Ito has the English and the voice and the beauty. But her style isn’t very in wish modern popular music – I mean, while Koda Kumi is slutting it up with Fergie and Goto Maki is following Beyonce’s bootyliciousness, Yuna’s counterpart is Celine Dion. And Celine Dion isn’t really top 40 hit material these days. If she gets lucky, she could make it with a well advertised and placed ballad – but she’d have to work on her upbeat songs, because she’s really bad at those. Chances: 45%.

Chatmonchy

Chatmonchy rocks out, hard. What really hurts them is that Eriko’s distinct vocals, too high and shrill sometimes even in Japan, is definitely too high and shrill for American audiences. If they get a good song, they might catch on, but it would take a lot of effort to get audiences to like such high pitched vocals matched with rock. Chances: 10%.

Angela Aki

She’s already tried and failed; that doesn’t put Angela off to a great start. Angela has piano pop that would make it paired with her great voice, but her image isn’t very interesting or attention grabbing and she doesn’t have the model-esque looks. Her music also tends to blend in – they’re calming, but few are extremely striking as to become that one big hit. But her music speaks for itself – she could make it as the next Vanessa Carlton with a few hits of her own, if she’s lucky. Chances: 50%.

There’s more ladies of course, but that’s all I can think of (or bear to go through) right now. I’m still rooting for Utada, big time, because I love her music and hope that she gets success, but who knows – maybe one day Fergie will return a favor to Kuu-chan or the rest of the world will pick up on Namie’s fierceness and I’ll hear one of them on my local radio.

I’ve never done a survey on here before, so to start, Celestia’s Bikkuri Survey.

1. You have found a magical J-pop genie who will grant you one J-pop related wish (so no wishing for a million dollars or world peace or anything like that). It can be virtually anything as long as it’s directly related to J-pop, and don’t worry, because this is the nice sort of genie, not the kind who will try to find a loop-hole and screw up your wish. So, what do you wish for???
Quite honestly? That I become a top-selling J-pop idol whose popularity spans the world! I’d like to have Utada’s musicality, Stephanie’s voice, and Otsuka Ai’s artistry.

2. Is there any J-pop artist or group who seriously pisses you off? If yes, who, and why? Probably Koda Kumi. I think her ero-kawaii stint just never sat well with me, and despite having liked some of her songs I think her music is monotonous now. It’s one of those uncontrollable feelings – she has a good personality and a good voice, I guess, but every time I see her strut onto stage wearing almost nothing singing a song that sounds like four of her others I fast forward.

3. Who do you think is the sexiest Japanese singer out there?
Yamapi. Okay, that was really biased – without my bias, it’d probably be Akanishi Jin from KAT-TUN. He’s kind of a slut (read: Lovejuice.)

4. How about the cutest?
Perfume, as a trio. Their image and their music and their personalities are all adorable.

5. Best personality?
Otsuka Ai – she seems funny and witty and quirky but is also emotional and intelligent.

6. If given the opportunity, would you rather date person 3, person 4, or person 5?
Given as 4 and 5 are four girls, I’d go with 3. Wait, but person 3 is both Yamapi and Jin – well, I’d just take both of them.

7. You work for a Japanese music magazine, and you have the opportunity to interview your favorite artist or group. What are a couple of the questions you want to ask them?
I’d interview NEWS and ask them the truth about how they felt about their group, if Johnny doesn’t blacklist me. And if I’m not allowed to, I’ll just ask them standard interviewing question – hey, at least then I could meet them.

8. What’s the best (J-pop) song to listen to when you are really sad?
“Pocket”  by Otsuka Ai

9. When you’re really happy?
“weeeek” by NEWS, and right now, “One Love” by Arashi

10. Do you often sing along to your favorite songs?
Yes, when I’m alone – usually in the car, or in the shower. Usually I don’t know the lyrics so I hum or make up my own words along with it.

11. How about dance?
Yep, I’m terribly guilty of trying to fake along some Perfume dance moves.

12. Artistic integrity question!! If someone offered to pay you for blogging, but they were allowed to censor some of your opinions or veto some of your blogging ideas, would you do it?
Yes. I like money. And really, if you write professionally as a career, your own opinions usually are censored, so I don’t see how being paid for blogging would be a lack of integrity in any way.

So the Oricon half year charts are finally out. Out of the top 100 singles, the Johnny’s releases are:

2. KAT-TUN – DON’T U EVER STOP – 433,168
3. KAT-TUN – LIPS – 421,902
5. Arashi – Step and Go – 374,449
7. NEWS – Taiyou no Namida – 291,447
10. NEWS – SUMMER TIME – 251,056
11. Kanjani8 – Wahaha – 228,563
13. Hey! Say! JUMP – Dreams come true – 220,072
16. SMAP – Dangan Fighter – 173,586
18. SMAP – Sonomama / White Message – 158,837
20. V6 – way of life – 143,599
22. Maizu Tsukasa (Domoto Koichi) – No more – 127,905
32. 244 ENDLI-x – Kurikaesu Haru – 94,044
33. V6 – Chou – 89,871
49. Tackey & Tsubasa – Koi Uta/PROGRESS – 68,973
54. MATCHY with QUESTION? – Mezamero Yasei – 59,035
59. KAT-TUN – Keep the Faith -55,580
66. 20th Century (V6) – Ore ja Nakya, Kimi ja Nakya – 50,011
67. Hey!Say! JUMP – Ultra Music Power – 49,732
82. NEWS – weeeek – 42,405

19 entries on the top 100; 20% of the charts, and 44% of the top 25. Very nice. I think everything released this year is on the list, not surprisingly. More un-surprises? KAT-TUN is still the best selling JE group, Arashi is doing very well, as is NEWS, Kanjani8 is a little behind, SMAP is still loved, Japanese love little children aka Hey!Say!JUMP, Koichi sells more than Tsuyoshi despite having more mediocre music, and a bunch of Tackey and Tsubasa’s fans have jumped ship. You know, same old same old. A lot of last year’s releases have done extremely well.

As for the top ten though, it looks like KAT-TUN and Arashi will be the only ones on it for sure; NEWS’ “Taiyou no Namida” might make the cut. Their “Summer Time” will, inevitably, get pushed off the top ten by GReeeeN’s “Kiseki” though. As for the top spot, if JE wants a top yearly hit it’d have to put out something really good, because I don’t see “DON’T U EVER STOP” getting enough sales to beat out “Soba ni Iru ne.”

Overall, JE sales still aren’t as great as they were two years ago – remember the great year of Seishun Amigo, Real Face, and Daite Senorita being a power trio at the top of the charts? But JE still has the Japanese fangirls (and the fangirls’ money) wrapped around its well manicured in a manly way finger. And I am glad to have contributed to their pot of gold v.

This has been circulating madly amongst NEWS and Yamapi fans, but for those who don’t know yet: a few days ago, Yamashita Tomohisa (NEWS, probably better known now as Yamapi) went on a private trip to Korea with his friend Shirota Jun (D-Boy’s Shirota Yuu’s brother) and his manager. It went all well, but news of his trip somehow leaked on the sixth, and at the airport for his return flight… well, I’ll let the video speak for itself. (You might want to turn down the volume.)

(edit 4/23/2008 – original YT video taken down, Mezamishi news report substituted)

More than a thousand fans turned up at the airport in just hours; since this was a private trip, there was not enough security at the airport to handle this. After he arrived, the fans just all mobbed him. While fighting to get his way through, he had his shirt ripped, was grabbed at, had hair pulled out, and a gift thrown at him. His manager and Shirota were angry at the fans and reportedly cursed, but Yamapi stayed silent and even gave a wave. However, as the fancam shows, as soon as he entered the gates he collapsed onto his knees.

Fangirls are universally pretty crazy; that’s a given. Japanese fans scream and wave uchiwas and some stalk their idols, but it’s a general given that Chinese fans are crazier with their idols, and Korean fans are the most enthusiastic of all. You always see Korean bands like DBSK and Super Junior surrounded by fans.

I love Yamapi, so I have a big personal say in this, but I think it is absolutely disgusting what these girls are doing. Screaming I get, mobbing I get – but to almost physically attack your idol? And another video – without sound, but watch for at around 15 seconds in:

(edit 4/23/2008 – YT video taken down, download soundless clip here)

Even amongst the madness, he helps a girl who has fallen in the frenzy stand up – and what does she do? Hold her camera up right to his face. Many Korean netizens are shocked and disgusted by the whole incident, saying that the whole event is a terrible representation of Korea on the international front of entertainment.

I am extremely proud of how Yamapi handled himself in this situation. Say what you will about this kind of attention being the price of fame – very, very few people can withstand this madness and still hold his composure and temper, even think to wave goodbye. This is a man who loves his fans, is kind to them even when they are literally attacking him. I have so much respect for him – just from this incident he’s really shown his poise as a celebrity.

As for the fans – I’m going to have to say I’m not surprised. If there’s one thing I’ve found inherently different between Japanese and Korean entertainment, it’s that Japanese entertainment revolves around the idols, while Korean entertainment revolves around the fans. Let’s use two examples of companies with male idols: Johnny’s Entertainment and SM Entertainment. Korean fans of idols will stalk, mob, protest; anti-fans will attack; SM will do nothing. You have idols rushed everywhere, dangerous and obsessive fans and anti-fans, and the insane stake-out of Super Junior fans protesting a possible company move – and the company doesn’t do much.

But in Johnny’s, the fans respect the idol. Or they don’t have to – if a large group of fans do something Johnny’s disapproves of, they will cut the fans off. After Nagoya fans displayed some rude behavior, they were cut off from concert tours. JE made an attempt to put KAT-TUN out in America a few years ago, but they seemed to pull back after their appearance at the Nisei Parade had some rude fan behavior. After some unruly behavior, artists themselves have asked the fans to behave.

If I were a JE fan in Korea, I would be furious right now – it seems imminent that JE will be cutting off Korea for awhile. Recently, there have been a few moves to appeal to Korean fans, on the part of Arashi performing at a world music festival and even holding a concert there. After this incident, though, the likeliness of other or any groups performing in Korea anytime soon seems slim to none. The Korean fans have proven that they love Yamapi; at the same time, this probably drives him further from them.

I am furious with these Korean fans who were involved; I feel like I have every right to judge them so. I’ve known about crazy fan behavior of this level in the past, but never to an idol that I personally followed. To see him hold himself up until the end, at which time he just collapses, hurts. Call me crazy too, but I’ve put an emotional investment in this man and seeing him like that makes my heart ache.

As a fan myself, I love Yamapi; I long to see him in person, I would love to shake his hand, I would be delighted to even be in the same building as him. I have entertained ideas to greet him and NEWS at the airport and have tried to find them when they were near my area. But I don’t think I could bear to see Yamapi have to suffer like he did, and I definitely wouldn’t be able to bear being the one who caused that kind of trauma.

Mostly in the US but also the entire western world, there is a big paparazzi culture. Photographers make their living stalking celebrities, mobbing them, reaching for them, shoving cameras at them, screaming questions and remarks at their face, forcing them into terrible situations – I can’t think of a more fitting example than what happened to Princess Diana. These are the types of ruthless actions that people use to exploit celebrities at any expense to the celebrities themselves.

If you are so “in love” with your idol that you yourself would rush him, claw at him, scream in his ear, shove your camera right in front of his face – do you really love him at all?